Who Do You Run To When Your SOUL Is Crying?

"I'm the CEO of a fortune 500 company, I'll loose my six figure salary!" , "I'm the president of a prestigious college, I took an oath to protect those I serve!",  "I'm the leader of a growing ministry, it will damage my witness..!",  "I'm the leader of my child's PTA, the other parents will isolate me from all activities....

SOUNDS FAMILIAR?

These are words that people often say when they have issues, sins, struggles, or however you would like to label them, that they feel they could never tell anyone about for the fear of...the WHAT IF..

This weekend my husband and I had a very long conversation about people who have fallen because they felt they had know one to talk to about the things they were struggling with. We all have something that we're struggling with, if you say you don't, then you're struggling with lying. As none of us have arrived in our daily walk to the point there isn't an issue of blood that we need to seek healing and deliverance from. He gave examples of preachers with mega churches who have fallen because it is believed they didn't have anyone to run to. There have been physicians and political leaders in our very own city who have fallen because they too felt they had know one to run to. I personally know people, including myself, who has endured pain alone because we felt know one would believe us.

The fear of your truth being rejected is a bad thing to feel when you know you telling YOUR truth is the very thing that's going to save your life from destruction. But who do you run to when your SOUL is ready to be free? Who do you trust with your truth when your truth is a lie to the people who you serve or influence and or to the world.

When I came out with my truth of my past, and being an adulterous woman who slept with married men, and who watched pornography, and suffered from an eating disorder, the spirit of whore-dorm, and the spirit of suicide; (Weee, that was a lot... lol) yes, but God has delivered me so I am no longer bound by my past. But back to my story. :). When I began to tell my testimony and how my journey has lead me to a place of peace, most people were shocked because I don't look like where I've been or what I've experienced. But, it took years for me to come out because I was afraid people would judge me, and I would be rejected by those whom I loved. But what I've learned in my studying of the SOUL... there is no fear in LOVE. When you begin to tell the truth about who you are and the expediences you've had, those who supposed to be in your life will commend you for your courage and be by your side as you walk these things out.

Satan wants us to sit in hiding and remain bound and broken. He wants to embarrass us and use our experiences as a weapon to those who look up to us. But what we have to remember is, God's love covers all and Jesus Christ's blood was the sacrifice for every sin we have and haven't committed.

What not to do is sit in silence and die a slow death of pain.

Here are a few suggestions that helped me when my SOUL was crying.

1. Find someone who you trust, even if you have to pay for a professional counselor... cry out to that person for help. I found a friend in my music theory teacher. Her home was a safe haven for me and she was there to listen and sometimes just a place for me to lay my head and rest.

2. Follow the instructions given to you by the one who you've entrusted with your truth. What's the point in confiding in someone, especially if you're paying for it, and you not listen to their advice. The word says there's safety in a multitude of counselors. So, since you found safety there, trust that they are giving you the right advice.

3. Write down what your experiences are and how those experiences make you feel. Identify what the root cause of your pain is coming from. Then seek spiritual guidance from someone in the word of God on how to walk out your experiences in a spiritual way. There is work to be done when you're dealing with issues of our past that are now showing up in your adult life. This will take someone who is mature in the word of God and who has already done their spiritual work.

4. Believe you have the right to be free. If you doubt in your heart that you don't deserve to walk in freedom, then all of what you've done from 1-3 was in vain. God has not given us the spirit of fear, but of love, peace and a sound mine. Our Souls longeth to be free from those dis-eases that causes us to retreat to things that makes our heart ache.

5. Tell yourself EVERYDAY you are worth living. Suicide entered my mind more than twice while I was in my mess, but one day I heard a voice say, SMILE LISA...SHOW UP EVERYDAY  FOR YOURSELF LISA, AND SUCCEED EVERYDAY LISA. I've done just that...

Do not suffer in silence, God has someone ready, willing, prepared and able to help walk you to your peace.


Be blessed,
and remember to
"Find Peace Within"
Ms.. Lisa D.
#LDFPWN 

What do you do while you're in the Season of Reaping What You've Sown? - "When Harvest Time and Soul Meets"

"To everything there is a season, A time for every purpose under heaven. A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant and a time to pluck what is planted; a time to kill, a time to heal; a time to break down; and a time to build up; a time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn and a time to dance; a time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing; a time to gain, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to throw away; a time to tear, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak; a time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace." Ecc. 3: 1-8.

I just wonder how many of us really have taken the time to think about this scripture. Reaping time and Harvest. That's not a question, just a statement..a thought..something to just think about. I believe when most of us think about seed time and harvest we think of giving tithe and offering and reaping from the sacrifice of giving that we give unto the Lord. However, have you ever thought what would it be like for you when it's reaping time of the bad things you've sown? Lately I've been thinking about that.

As I'm going through my spiritual walk, I've been thinking about the things I've done in my past, and how I've wrong some people and never owned up to what I did. Sounds familiar? I'm sure it does. We have to remember what the Bible says, we will reap what we sow, Gal. 6:7. The more I search my soul, the more the Holy Spirit reveals to me those things in my past and some in my present, that I am now reaping from.

There are things I did in my second marriage that I know was just dead wrong... I mean dead wrong. I blamed him for so many things..even though the marriage was bad and mentally and emotionally and verbally abusive, I played my part in damaging it as well. I cannot ignore the part I played in making it that way. Bad situations will cause you to act out of character.. that too doesn't mean you want reap what you sowed. Ownership is so important to your healing process. This is a good start to true authenticity. So this time I vowed to love, love and love.... however, there is still a reaping... grace is only for a time...I learned the seeds I sowed in my previous marriage doesn't mean that my current marriage will be the place of reaping. That's one thing we cannot control... where, when and how the reaping will come.

One morning during my prayer and meditation time, I asked the Lord what should I do during this season of reaping, as I just wanted to stay in a state of mind of feeling sorry for myself, after all I'm a very nice person, a contagious spark of hope. The Holy Spirit spoke clearly through the scriptures Galatians 6:

1. Refuse to become discouraged
2. Determine to keep your faith alive and active
3. Give and keep on giving; love and keep on loving.

Continue in the attitude of expectancy. A God possessed life guarantees partnership with God in world wide presence. Your conscious will be clear and your SOUL will be at peace. 

This is my message to you to day; when Harvest Time and Soul meets, allow your spirit man to minister to the experience. Refuse to beat yourself up for what you're experiencing in your harvest time. Do not let your faith waiver by no means and continue to share the gospel with others. And most importantly continue to love and give, even if you have to continue to love and give to those whom you are now receiving that harvest from. This perhaps maybe the challenge for us all. But when you realize what God is doing in your spiritual walk, you'll embrace the journey and allow your SOUL to be healed and set free.

I promise you, you'll feel better knowing you did it God's way and not yours.

Be blessed
And remember to Find Peace Within,

Ms. Lisa

How do you know he's right for you? When Value and Soul Meets

The Wisdom of Sundays by: Oprah Winfrey, has become apart of my morning meditation reading. If you follow me on social media, you should know that I am a huge fan of "Super Soul Sundays".. yes I read more than the Bible...  This composition of some of Oprah's most powerful spiritual aha moments has really helped me further my spiritual journey. In her GPS chapter she shares a lesson from Author and spiritual leader, Caroline Myss.

I quote - "So how do you know when its right for you? When do you know he's the right one for you? When that's the right job for you? - When you're not put in a position to betray yourself. You don't betray yourself anymore. You're not put in a position where you feel like you have to negotiate your sense of integrity, which is an act of betrayal. (to yourself). You don't feel like you have to compromise who you are. When you have enough respect for yourself to say something. (Value yourself).

You don't feel like you're being drained. This isn't costing me my psyche. This isn't costing me my soul. I don't feel confused on some deep level. I'm not drained. I can be tired after a days work, but I'm not psychically drained where I feel like I'm losing life." Carolina Myss.

I'm not sure how you feel about the words from Carolina Myss, but for me it was a true aha moment!

This is a lesson I believe we all could learn from. You see I was that girl earlier in my journey. I wanted to be with the one who had all the money, who could help me raise my baby, financially that is. He would be the one who would pay all my bills, pay for my son to go to college and all my troubles would be over. Only to find out, I was becoming someone who I didn't like and NOPE he didn't pay for my son to go to college and nor did he pay all MY bills. Only the bills he created.

And now with the job... yell the job would be the answer to all my financial and professional needs and desires. Unbeknownst to me, there would be a system in place that would try to block me from moving up and receiving raises. It would make me question my ability to do the job and have me crying during my lunch breaks because I hated it so much.

What was the straw that broke the camels back in each of the above stories? It was me realizing that I deserved the right to be loved the way God intended and my talents and gifts were not for sale at the price of my sanity. Now, I can truly say that I am in love with someone who loves me in-spite my past. Who loves me when I'm loud and when I'm quiet. Who lets me act a plum fool and gives me the space I need to be me.

I find myself evaluating relationships and circumstances that I come across during this spiritual journey. I evaluate them NOW because I can't have anything in my life that will cause me to become someone I'm not. I will not entertain conversations that will require me to lie about who and what I am. I just don't want something coming in my life that's going to disrupt my peace to the point I don't know who I am or why I'm doing what I'm doing. I want to always be aware and awake spiritually so I can identify what and why something is happening in my life. I want to be able to identify the lesson I'm supposed to learn and how will I be able to help others through my learned lesson.

Just recently I had to tell my best friend that I would rather be her friend than her business partner because I didn't like the way I responded to her when we had to have THOSE CONVERSATIONS. Her friendship meant more to me than any job could ever mean. Me voicing my truth helped her see that we were headed in the wrong direction if we were going to be successful in this venture together something had to change. We talked about what we needed from each other and vowed to honor those wishes respectfully. 

I will not compromise my integrity nor my peace for the sake of anyone else's pain and neither should you.

How do you know when your soul is speaking out for your VALUE?

1. When your voice has become silent. - know that your voice matters and you have the right to be an advocate for your soul.

2. When someone says something to you that goes against everything you believe in - do not compromise your beliefs just because someone disagrees with you and the way you do what you do.

3. When you feel you've out grown a group of people or a situation. - You have to know when you're being called to a higher standard. When the pull to move on has come.... move! Value everything you learned during that season and use it to help someone else.

4. When you feel the weight being lifted and the burdens are no longer holding you down. - You're walking in the right direction my friend when you can stand solid in your decisions.  It's your peace you're after not anyone else's. 

"Remember a Center Soul is a Center Mind"
Find Peace Within

Be blessed,

Ms. Lisa D.

Your "Why" is the only "Why" you need to know - When "Why" and "Soul" Meets

Why did he talk to me that way? Why did she say that to me? Why did he not love me enough? Why would he do that to me after all the sacrifices I've made for him? Why would someone not show me the same kind of love that I've shown them? Why? Why? Why? Was I not enough? Why couldn't he love me the same way I loved him? Why would she tell other people about my private life? Why would she betray me that why?

How many times have we asked our selves those question, I certainly have. I've asked those question over and over, especially when I've given my all to someone, made sacrifices for someone I didn't have to all because I thought I was in love or had a real friendship. I've done things that I didn't want to do for someone ONLY to be kicked like a dog and left out like a cat.

So, we sit around with our Kleenex tissue,  wrapped in our sofa blanket,  having a pity party. Crying and moaning about WHY did this person do what they did to me and all the pain someone else caused in our lives, when in all reality, we should be asking ourselves "WHY" did I allow someone to cause so much pain in my life.

Recently I had a conversation with a young lady who was asking all the "WHY" questions about someone else's actions towards her. My response to her was , what would you do if you never get to know why he did what he did to you. Would you be okay not knowing. Initially she said No, she would not be okay not knowing and she felt like he needed to tell her why. I then told her, "your why is the only why that you need to know." Why did YOU allow this to happen to you... that's the real question.

What is it about the love I have for myself or the lack of love that I have for myself that I would allow someone to treat me any kind of way. She was blown away... and begin to think about how she treats herself which is the mirror we use to show other's how to treat us. We attract people into our lives based on the way we treat ourselves. We attract what we are. If you're a loving person, then you should be attracting loving people into your space. If you are a giving person, you should be attracting giving people into your space. If you are a crazy person, you're more than likely attracting crazy people in your circle. If you are a self-centered person, you are probably attracting self-centered people into your circle.

When "Why" and "Soul" meets.... The Soul will cause you to take inventory of your spirit. The Soul will cause you to hold your spirit accountable for what you bring into its presence. Your Soul will tell you when the spirit is going the wrong way and why something isn't good for you. That includes people. When people come into your life causing chaos and confusion in your spirit, then they need to go. You have to make a decision that you will not allow this person to disrupt the peace of God in your life. Your Soul will be the guide. However it takes work to get to this point in your spiritual walk.

Your spiritual walk is all about YOUR Spirit being connected to the Holy Spirit. When your spirit is awakened by what God wants for your life, you will NEVER sit back and allow someone to disrupt the plan that God has for you. And that plan starts with PEACE. Your Journey to a Smile will push you to say NO to things that you do not want to do and NO to things that will make you compromise the work that you've done on your way to peace.

When "WHY" and "SOUL" meets... Truth will show up in the form of FREEDOM of SPEECH for your life. Use your first amendment rights and speak up for what you will and will not allow. Tell yourself the truth about your "WHY" and make a decision to NEVER wonder WHY someone did what they did to you... The only Why you need to know is YOURS.

Remember, the only Why that's important to you, is your Why...

Here are three questions you should ask yourself when questioning your "WHY"
1.  What is it about me that would attract someone who would treat me in such a way.
2.  What is it about me that I'm not loving enough to allow someone to treat me in such a way.
3.  What is it I need to do to begin to stop the cycle of chaos in my life.

Now do this:

1.  Write it out and speak the truth about it. Journal daily what you've identified
2.  Hold yourself accountable.
3.  Let your Soul be the voice that guides your Spirit into all Truth.. your truth.


Remember, to Find Peace Within
Be Blessed,
Ms. Lisa

I'm Sorry You're Offended - When Accountability and Soul Meets

... Authenticity requires us to be who we be when we're being who we be... I know that's not proper English, however, I'm sure you get what I'm saying. If I walk in the bathroom, I expect to see certain things; like a toilet and a sink,. If it's a full bathroom, I expect to see more than a toilet and a sink. I expect to see either a tub or a shower. There's know confusion about its identity. It's clear, I'm in a bathroom.

This doesn't always happen when we're dealing with humans. Often times, who a person presents to the world is not who the person really is. It's like dating, most people show up on the date as an representation of who they believe the other person would like to see and would like to spend time with.

Let's say, the relationship starts out really good... the two involved are really enjoying spending time together, then one day, the guards are let down and something dark about one of the persons is revealed.

You then have to make a decision... is this someone whom I want to spend time with and invest my emotions into? Many of us don't end the relationship, but continue on with the hopes that part of the person's character will not present him or herself too often. But, that THING continues to show up. You then make the decision NOT to be apart of the relationship anymore.

Is it wrong that you decided to look out for YOURSELF first? Is it wrong that you made a conscious decision about your future and your future emotions with this person? Is it wrong to make the decision to NOT invest anymore time into a relationship that you know will take you down a dark hole? Is it wrong that you made a decision about the type of person you would like to do life with? Absolutely NOT. I say, make the decision now while it's FREE before you have to PAY to get out of it. And the paying doesn't always have to be money. That paying could be time, effort, emotional connection, money, etc. Love and relationships are not limited to marriage.

I hear you saying..."Where are you going with this Lisa?" Here's where I'm going with this...

I have very few friends, even though I am a very friendly person and am pretty nice and pleasant to people I meet. However, when it comes down to people whom I spend time with, I'm very selective.

Recently I had to tell a close friend or someone whom I though was very close, that our friendship was one-sided and I didn't believe there was value in continuing in the friendship. Friendships works both ways...why do I have to be the one doing all the giving in the relationship? After all we suppose to be looking out for each other, RIGHT... When I find out that you've shared some of our most intimate conversations with other's... this puts a breach in our relationship.. I can know longer trust you with my heart, therefore, your type of friendship is not the type of friendship I choose to have.

She was Offended, yes, very Offended. WHY? Because when you call someone on the carpet and hold them accountable for their actions...it's easy to become offended. BUT when you're really sincere in your intentions and in the relationship, you'll be willing to correct your behavior, make amends and move forward. That however didn't happen... So, as I stated before...Is it wrong to end it when it's not working anymore..."ABSOLUTELY NO!"

When do you know it's time to end the relationship?

1. When you are too depended on one another - if your friend has to know your every move..it's time to move one. If he or she gets offended when you spend time with your other friends... This is not a good sign of a healthy relationship. Talk about it, if the talk isn't received the way you intended, then its time to let it go.
2. The friendship is one-sided - as in my case. The friendship was one-sided. I gave - she took. This is not the way friendships are supposed to be. It may take time before you begin to notice this behavior. But, once you begin to notices it, say something..If its received and you two can work it out, then do so, if not, then it's time to move on. sometimes friends  don't even realize what's happening, which too can be a bad thing..as they may have a selfishness about themselves that they can't recognize when you're in pain.  That too isn't good for any relationship.
3. Your friend isn't supportive - this is HUGE for me. I'm an author and a singer.. my friend doesn't have any of my books,(only the sample/proof I gave her and hasn't read that either) and doesn't come to hear me sing, even when it's around the corner. I don't even feel comfortable telling her where we're going to minister or if I'm working on another book... WHY, because she will make it about her, say something sarcastic, and talk about what she did or didn't do. This is not a good friend to have. Once again, talk about it as I did, and make a decision... if you can't be supportive, then you're probably not a good friend.
4. When you're going down different paths - Sometimes you just grow apart. It's good when you can still have your elementary or high school best friend in your latter years. You stayed in touch, did  girl trips, became the god parents of each other's children, stood up for each other at all your weddings. She's there for you when you were hurting and laughing. But what happens when you're just not going in the same direction and you just don't have much in common anymore? You're not doing the same type of stuff anymore... no clubbing, no smoking, no sleeping around, no lying and back biting..If your friendships aren't enhancing you, then you probably need to evaluate the value in the relationship.

When Accountability and Soul Meets - Soul will give you the courage to face a friend when you feel things aren't right. Soul will force you to make a decision about what works best for you. As the Soul's wants to be at peace with all men. at all times and will let you know when you are not at PEACE.

Don't be afraid to let The Soul help you hold other's accountable for the way they treat you..

Remember to Find Peace Within

Be blessed,
Ms. Lisa

The Truth is in the Suffering - When Pain and Soul Meets

How are you? "Fine" - yell, I'm tired, tired but not the kind of tired that comes from not getting enough sleep. I'm tired of trying, I'm tired of being let down, I'm tired of faking happiness, I'm tired of being sad, I give up!"

Have you ever felt that way? Has this conversation ever crossed your lips? Has these types of feelings caused you any type of pain? It certainly has come across my mind, my mouth, in my actions, and has caused me pain.

What is pain? Here's how I define pain:

Pain - a source of discomfort. - that which is caused when something unexpected happens - that thing that breaks your normal way of living. The unexpected that knocks you off your feet.

You see pain doesn't have to be associated with hitting your toe on the end of the coffee table, or the pain you get when you touch the surface of a hot stove. It's not necessarily the pain you get when you get a paper cut or from that hang nail that just want go away. Pain comes in different forms. The pain I'm talking about today is the pain of the SOUL. That pain that still remains in our lives because we failed to observe where the pain was really coming from.

In my Care of the Soul study, I'm learning that we should work with what is rather than with what we wished were there. And why is this? Well, I believe it's more difficult to find our way through the world than to find our way beyond the world. You see to go beyond something means you bypass the stuff in the middle. When we're on our journey through the world/life, its more difficult because we have to observe what's going on in our world... which I've found to be one of the hardest things for most of us to do.

We want to sidestep negative moods and emotions and our bad life choices and unhealthy habits. But we cannot over look any of those things when we're dealing with the pain and the care of the SOUL. We have to observe the SOUL as it is in order to deal with the PAIN it's in. 

Religion can have a way of making us believe that salvation will take away the PAIN, but on the contrary my friend; when PAIN and SOUL meets, there is now an awareness that wasn't there before. When we begin to do our spiritual work, we will find a deeper respect for what is actually going on in our lives. If we try to avoid the realities that life brings, the mistakes and failures, we move beyond the ability to deal with the SOUL. You have to face it head on..you can't run or hide from it.

How do we avoid those things in life that has or is causing us PAIN on our way to caring for our SOUL? Is it okay to give room for the horrible symptoms and hopeless compulsions we have? Many of which causes pain in our lives?

It is our nature to try an alleviate any pain when caring for a love one. You know those "Intervention" shows...the ones that forces people into a rehabilitation facility for their own good. Many go because they feel they have no choice, and some go because they really want to get better. But the most common thing is... many are not ready to deal with the reality of their PAIN. Because dealing with the PAIN will only cause more pain... at least that's what most think.

Sometimes it's good to just submit to the pain and let healing begin. 

When I realized I was dealing with Bulimia, I had to do my SOUL work in order to get better. That work was HARD. It revealed somethings in me that I wasn't too proud of. You see What my PAIN revealed to my SOUL was rejection, abandonment, loneliness, low-self esteem, and a loss of identity. 

This PAIN manifested through Bulimia (eating disorder) and sexual promiscuity (fornication and adultery). I had to deal with many things from my childhood..the thoughts I had about my body, the relationship or the lack of relationship I had with my father and my feelings towards him. It took me from 2001 to 2006 to acknowledge that I had a problem. It wasn't until I began my journey to a smile and began my spiritual work, I was able to walk in my truth and began caring for my SOUL.

It want be easy but it can be done. I didn't think I would ever be able to talk about what I've been through without feeling ashamed. Today, I'm free to talk about it ALL. My life is an open book..I have been set free by the Blood of the Lamb and the words of my testimony. 

"If we can see the story we are in when we fall into our various compulsive behaviors and moods that cause us pain, then we might know how to move through them more freely and with less distress." @Thomas Moore

When PAIN meets SOUL, the healing will reveal truth and freedom. PAIN will allow SOUL to do what it does best... soothe the broken heart and allows truth to whip away all guilt and shame. There's no shame in the PAIN when SOUL speaks for you.

"The life of the SOUL is a continual going over and over of the materials of life".... Keep telling your story, your SOUL is listening.

Remember to 

Find Peace Within,

Be Blessed

Ms. Lisa 

All Bad Isn't Bad - When Dependence and Soul Meets

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.
I love thee to the depth and breadth and height
My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight
For the ends of being and ideal Grace.
I love thee to the level of everyday’s
Most quiet need, by sun and candlelight.
I love thee freely, as men strive for Right.
I love thee purely, as they turn from Praise.
I love thee with the passion put to use
In my old griefs, and with my childhood’s faith.
I love thee with a love I seemed to lose
With my lost saints—I love thee with the breath,
Smiles, tears, of all my life!—and, if God choose,
I shall but love thee better after death.." Elizabeth Barrett Brownings

This is how much we should love our SOUL. depth, breadth, height, everyday, quiet, sun and candlelight. Free, pure, passion,love that is lost, through smiles, tears, and all my life. and if God is willing I will love my SOUL even better after death... because I did the work here on earth so that my soul will be happy when it departs this earth.

We can't care for the soul unless we are familiar with its ways. What do I mean when I say, "familiar with its ways". What I'm saying is, we can't care for something if we don't know how it works, how it should be. We should observe our SOUL and how it responds to certain situations. How much do I love my SOUL? Do I love her enough to give her the attention she needs to be better. When we observe the soul we keep an eye on what ever she is wondering and gazing at. We observe the latest addictions, a striking dream, or a troubling mood she may be in. We notice when she's out of character and or doing something that is out of the ordinary. 

I'll share one of my most resent experiences that made me observe my soul and how she was responding to how I was acting. 

Recently I started working part-time for a small company where I keep their financials. I took this job because it was something new and I like doing spreadsheets and working with numbers. As I was going through my training, I noticed how dependent I had become on the other employee who was training me. I wouldn't do anything with out their help or without her approval. You see, I was new to this type of business and didn't feel I was capable of learning it. She, too, made me feel like I wasn't capable of doing the job because of those who did the job before me. I became so dependent on her that it would cause me to make errors that I normally wouldn't make. I began having anxiety when I saw her number on my phone. WHY, because, I felt she was calling to tell me I made a mistake and or ask me why did I do such and such. 

I had to ask myself the question, why are you responding to her that way. What is it you're afraid of?"  I discovered that I was responding to her that way because I didn't want to fail. AND the fear of disappointing myself petrified me. I wanted to do a good job. You see, I depended on her so much that I made mistakes I would not have made had I had the confidence I needed to do the job. 

This experience let me see that I still had areas in my life where I needed to grow. It wasn't until she wasn't available to help me that I discovered I had it in me all along. I was capable of doing the work and I could do a good job too. 

So, what does that have to do with the SOUL? 

The SOUL needs certain things to grow. Certain things needs to happen in your life that will cause you to observe how you respond to what life is throwing at you. The SOUL will let you know what needs to be dealt with in your life. But it's not until you are awakened by some situations that will make you stop and think.

Being dependent on someone will make you feel powerless and insecure. You'll have the inability to make decisions on your own. Ask yourself this question, "When does dependence show up in your life?" What triggers in your being that makes you become dependent? For me, it's when I don't feel good about myself or when I don't want to be held accountable if something goes wrong. I can easily point the finger at someone else and not be blamed. (this was before I did my work... :). )

Now, that we see that being dependent can open our SOUL to what is really going on in our "being", we can begin to do the work that we need to do to become whole within ourselves and learn to be inter-dependent. 

Here are a few steps to help you begin your journey..

1. Become conscious of the fears underlying your dependence.
    It could be something as small as sleeping with the lights on. Often our patterns began as     a child but we never stopped them once we became an adult. Why do you need to check     on your children everyday, now that they are away from home? Could it be more about         you and less about them? 

2. Don't Fear Lonliness
    It's okay to just BE with your BEING. Don't fill your time up with doing because you're           afraid of the thoughts you have when you're alone. That's the time when you need to             connect with what the SOUL is saying to you. This is when you can make peace with             yourself. Say I'm sorry, and tell yourself how much you mean to you.Take this time to find     out who you are and what it is you like and don't like. Make the adjustments as you begin     to grow into your own person. 

3. Don't Push Away Your Source of Emotional Dependence
   Overcoming emotional dependence is not about finding "Fault" with yourself and changing    it, but its more about using it as a guidance to finding out what truly lies on the other side      of the fear or insecurity that was causing the dependence. Take the bad part and identify      what is good on the other side.

When Bad and Soul Meets, you'll begin to overcome your emotional dependence. Freedom awaits..Your SOUL is depending on it.

Remember to 
Find Peace Within

Be blessed,
Ms. Lisa